Why does one family who has lost so much, have to lose more?
and why does each death they have to deal with be so tragic?
Why can't I take the un-bearable pain away from my best friend?
Why can't the knowledge of the gospel and eternal families just erase the pain?
It's been a rough day. My best friend JaLayn's mom died last night. This woman was amazing. They had 11 kids and it never slowed her down for a second. She was the very center of that family and had a relationship with every child and grandchild. She was so giving. She accepted me from day 1, since I was 12 yrs old and always treated me like part of the family. She was at the temple the day I got married, she helped throw my baby shower when I was pregnant with Mady, she helped me and JaLayn make baby blankets for all our babies, she was always interested in my family and my kids. She always had such a positive outlook. A friend from high school told me this today: when VaLayn's son Brand'n died (another tragic story) when me and JaLayn were in Jr. High... she said when she walked through the viewing line, crying and saying how sorry she was, VaLayn hugged her and told her to never be sorry that someone we love is in Heaven with Heavenly Father. Although I know she struggled with it every year, she was so strong and tried to see the positive in things.
I wish I could take away JaLayn's pain. I called her last night, not even knowing this had happened. I didn't feel right when someone answered her phone that I knew wasn't family. she just said, "JaLayn is with her mom" it bothered me all night. I was afraid something had happened to her dad. I called JaLayn twice this morning and then got to dance and didn't see her there. I texted her and then finally her husband, he called me back almost immediately. I was in complete shock, yet somehow I knew something horrible had happened. I didn't expect this. I tried to be there for her tonight and be strong, but I just can't. I don't know how to answer her questions... I don't know how she's going to get through this either. I pray that she knows how much I love her and how awesome of a family she has. She is so much like her mother and should be so proud of that. They were best friends and I KNOW they will be together again. I know that she has a loving Heavenly Father that is watching over her and will not leave her in a time like this. I know that we just need to trust in His plan for all of us. Most of all I know that her mom had a very sweet reunion with Brand'n last night; the son she has missed every day for the last 13 years.
I love you VaLayn...thank you for sharing your heart, your home and your amazing family with me. I will miss you.
My best friend's mom just died in December too, very quickly and unexpectedly and all I could do was just cry with her. It's really hard not having all the answers that they/we need at those times! I'm so sorry Randi!!!
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